40ThingsWeCouldAllDoWithout

This is the list to end all lists, this is the list in which you get to write down all the things you would like to get rid off.

This is not going to be comprehensive, and we might have to revisit it when you’ve all had a look and decided to send me anything you want to add to my list.

So here goes, and I have numbered this list, purely so you can refer to any of the items more easily, to tell me where I’ve gone wrong.

Here is my list of things to remove from our planet.

1. Lists. Yes, I admit that lists are something to lose.
2. I particularly hate those list programs on television.
3. Call centers, this is a no brainer, everyone, even the people in call centers hate them.
4. Banks advertising, when they’re really hiding their money under a blanket in their offices right now.
5. Scotland, when are they going to wake up to the fact that they lose every important time they take the English on?
6. Russell Brand and Jonathan Ross for being such rubbish to Andrew Sachs on BBC radio 2 over the weekend. They deserve sacking.
7. Any more films about climate change that make statements without proof or evidence.
8. Any conspiracy clips on You Tube.
9. Music by James Blunt.
10. People parking on Disabled Parking spaces without reason or the correct stickers.
11. People who jump the line or queue.
12. Unsolicited telephone calls.
13. Drizzle, I don’t mind rain or sunshine or even snow, but drizzle is miserable. No one likes it, so let’s ban it outright!
14. Speed limits on motorways, highways etc.
15. Smoking anything ever. Since I stopped about 20 years ago anyone can, and must.
16. Anyone with a higher IQ than me, unless they’re anything to do with aircraft or other means of making me safe when I travel.
17. Anything and anyone that messes with any of my family or friends.
18. All the political parties in the UK with the exception of that chap in the Liberal Democrats, Vince Cable, who actually talks sense.
19. People claiming to be Spartacus when it’s obvious that I am Spartacus!
20. All those boring people that claim that they don’t have any time to watch television before they tell you, in detail, about every program.
21. People you care about dying.
22. Pets getting too old.
23. Long terminal illnesses of loved ones.
24. Short shocking illnesses of loved ones.
25. A lack of time to do all the things you wanted to do.
26. Long winter nights.
27. Angry people.
28. Fundamentalists of every hue, race, religion and creed.
29. Folk with bad memories, they cause so many fights.
30. Ignorance.
31. Lunatic drivers.
32. Green vegetables.
33. Almost all folk singers.
34. Morris dancers who bring shame on our otherwise great country by being the silliest people on the planet.
35. People who justify terrorism when it isn’t aimed in their direction.
36. George W Bush for pausing in, all the, wrong places.
37. Sarah Palin for letting down the possibilities for an elected woman in the highest reaches of American government.
38. All the bankers in the world for being greedy, greasy, inefficient and unapologetic.
39. The politicians for not having the good grace to admit that they are also at fault for our present problems.

That will do for now, please feel free to send me your additions or comments. I aim to use the best ideas in a follow up list.