Monday, March 24, 2008

Words We Won't Use

I don’t know about you, but I am getting so fed up with certain words. Every day I hear these words, and every day I get more annoyed by them. I’ve come to the conclusion that they use these words purely to annoy people like me. Perhaps you don’t know what I mean, so I shall list some of these words and see if they annoy you as well.

First on my list are the words, “climate change”. No day passes without someone saying or writing something about bloody climate change. I am fed up being blamed, along with the rest of you, for causing this. I don’t believe I am, and I am convinced that there has been, and always will be more climate change. I want my heating and air conditioning, and I love my big, powerful car. I have been informed that one quarter of the world’s carbon emissions emanate out of the asses of farting cattle, and I am prepared to bet that another quarter comes out of the mouths of the idiots who use climate change as an excuse to diminish the liberty of as many individuals as possible.

While we’re losing words, one that should never have existed is “multicultural”, because it’s a stupid label for a bankrupt conceit that should never have happened to us. I am convinced that the U.K. will, one day, discover that multiculturalism was a result of a planned social experiment by some far left bumbling bureaucrats. It has caused untold suffering to the economic migrants who were used up by it, and it will cause more grief to us all. By the way, let’s also drop the words, “hard left’”. That makes this small, otherwise unimportant group sound tumescent and powerful, whereas they are largely an intellectually flabby and secretive group of plotters who want to tell you and me how to live, but because they know they would never win a vote, they do their dirty deeds in the back rooms of the world.

The next words that must be eliminated from the England of Shakespeare, Churchill, Newton and Darwin are the words, “plastic bags.” I know that these bags are evil, perfidious and all pervasive, so let’s get rid of them, and stop talking about the X billion of plastic bags that will not vanish for ten thousand years. I’m happy to use paper, cloth, or anything else, just make them available and shut up!

Another collection of words rapidly becoming a total pain in the butt are, “sub prime mortgages.” This excuse for banking greed that has become a communal financial meltdown that might yet lead us to mass money suicide is depressing and masks the greed and possible criminal actions of a few bankers that should be what we need to examine and punish.

Please stop using any phrase with the word Islamic in it. Give that group and me a break. They cannot be that interesting. In the UK over the last several years it appears as if every news bulletin contains a story containing some mention of Islamic or Muslim and we could live with less, and so, I’m confident could the Muslims.

WAGS, the word, and WAGS the people should be consigned to the dustbin of history. This is an acronym for wives and girlfriends of soccer stars. They are vacant, preening, self-important little girls with big girl attitude with regard to their bloated self-importance and very big mirrors. Shut up and vanish, in another life you would be, at best, a trolley dolly on an airline, looking for a secure future with the only weapons you’ve got, good teeth and hair, fine legs and a healthy chest. In fact that qualifies you to be a racehorse.

Fundamentalists, this is another word for wrong headed, stupid murderous bastards. So are Freedom fighters, resistance guerrillas and militants. These are groups who should be captured, tried for their crimes against humanity and executed. It would be much easier for us all if every time a news item reported one of their murders they labelled the perpetrators, murderers.

Now I shall return to my exercise and diet and get on with my day, come to think of it, let’s get of the words diet and exercise and I could just go back to bed!