Thursday, August 28, 2008

WhoWeAre

During our lives we are often asked, “what do you do?” I now believe how we answer defines us. For most of my life I would happily respond, “I make films,” and this inevitably led to subsidiary questions that further evidenced my proposition. The most often asked is, “have you ever made anything I’d have heard of?” Of course if you were not able to satisfy this question with a suitably current and well-known film title, you were somehow assumed to be either lying or a total loser.

Worse still is to be able to supply a well known title with big stars attached, because then the next question is always, “what was he/she like to work with, have you got any funny stories?” If you answer this with a witty, well-paced anecdote your reception will be wonderful. However the next time you are to meet this person they are almost bound to introduce you to their friends with, “this is Tony, he works in the film industry and he’s going to tell you some really terrific funny stories!”

Once I attended a wedding and was determined not to get caught out and so was introducing myself to anyone that didn’t know me as, “I’m a business executive.”

The man sitting next to me said he was in the media business; in fact he was in the film industry. Somehow or other, without prompting from me, it transpired that he knew Tony Klinger, despite the fact that I was sitting next to him and my knowing I had never met the man. He went into quite some detail about his friendship with Tony Klinger, during which time the people who did know me were either tittering with laughter or on the edge of terminal embarrassment. Not able to stand it any longer I calmly revealed my identity to the dishonest man. He didn’t turn a hair.
When I was a teenager I was already working in a prestigious job in films and lived in a very desirable part of central London, so, because no one would believe the real details I made up the fact that I was a trainee accountant, which no one had a problem with.

I went through a period of nearly a decade when I spent most of my time working in academia but always felt uncomfortable with describing myself as an academic, and the main reason for this reticence was the fact that I never have felt like a true academic; I just don’t think like an academic.

When, recently I worked as the Chief Executive in the content creation section of mobile telephony I began to talk of myself as an executive, and described my role. However one of my business associates was affronted as he saw me as a filmmaker and wanted me to be more honest with myself.

So now I have gone full circle. Again, as at the very start of my career, I am describing myself as a writer. It is what has underscored and underwritten everything I have ever done, and fairly says to the world, here I am, a happy scribbler. It is a great relief to have rediscovered this simple truth, and it’s a wonderful relief.